Naked, “friendly” neighbor dragged from house by epic beard

A 64-year-old Kansas City woman woke to a frightening sight at 12:50 a.m. on Tuesday – her neighbor was standing over her, naked.

When Laurence K. Saunders allegedly grabbed the woman’s arm and told her that he was “just being friendly,” it was more than she could bear. She fought him off, then dragged him to the door of her house by his extremely impressive beard. As they reached the door, Saunders is said to have grabbed her by the throat – an action that earned him three blows to the head with a tape measure. He left.

In the aftermath the woman said that she found the man’s black shorts sitting on her DVD player. She said that she tossed them to him through the window as he sat sobbing on her deck.

Saunders, who police noted was drinking at the time, was charged with burglary, sexual misconduct and two counts of assault. [KC Star]