headlines

  • Life Imitates 24: Kiefer Sutherland Headbutts Fashion Designer

    A Kiefer Sutherland headbutt left fashion designer Jack McCollough requiring hospital treatment for a broken nose at an after-party in New York for the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Costume Institute Gala....
  • Mexican Footballer Receives Lengthy Ban For ‘Swine Flu’ Attack

    Guadalajara defender Hector Reynoso has been suspended for the remainder of the Liberatadores Cup after pretending coughing, spitting and expelling nasal mucus at a Everton Chile player Sebastian Penco during a game and then claiming that he was infected with swine flu. The South American Football Federation issued the...
  • Giraffe Stolen From Game Reserve For Food

    Eight people faced a South African court, the crime, stealing a giraffe from a game reserve. Officials quickly realized that the animal had been stolen for food as when they caught up with the men the animal had already been slaughtered and they were preparing to eat. All of...
  • Chinese Officials Ordered To Smoke Or Risk Fines

    In a move that is claimed to be designed to raise money through the cigarette tax, the Gong’an county government in Hubei province in China has ordered its staff to smoke their way through 230,000 packs of cigarettes per year. If they don’t manage to smoke all of them...
  • Investigation: TMZ’s Tupac Resurrection Is Nothing But a Hoax

    Gossip site TMZ recently showed some pictures of a man who appeared to be the late Tupac Shakur in a bar in New Orleans. This author will be the first to admit that the man in the image did bear more than a passing resemblance to the late great...
  • Woman Claims Father Was Zodiac Killer

    A woman has contacted San Francisco police claiming that her father was the infamous ‘Zodiac’ serial killer. The five killings, which took place in California 40 years ago, have long baffled investigators. While there have been numerous suspects, no one has ever been prosecuted....
  • Woman Tases Utah Highway Patrol Officer With Own Stun Gun

    When a 41-year-old woman hit a Utah Highway Patrol trooper with her shoe and bit him, he did what any law enforcement officer would do and reached for his Taser, only to have it malfunction. He then threw the stun gun on the ground and attempted to do with...
  • Raging Bull Runs Through Irish Supermarket

    The Cummins SuperValu supermarket in Ballinrobe, Ireland had an unusual visitor in the form of a young bull that came running through the open doors. Fortunately the animal did not cause too much damage and no one was injured as it ran down the aisles and past startled customers...
  • By Any Means Necessary: Dirty Tricks in Britain’s War Against Teenagers

    If United Kingdom business leaders and local community authorities are to be believed, then there is no greater threat to the country than gatherings of young people. They must be prevented from enjoying each others company by any means at any cost, lest they befoul surroundings with their bad...