Sports

  • Wrestler stink-fingers opponent, gets charged with sexual battery

    A 17-year-old wrestler from Fresno County is facing a charge of sexual battery after he employed an unsavory yet widely used technique in a match against a 14-year-old. The move in question is called a “butt drag” and it involves grabbing your opponent by the buttock and sticking fingers...
  • Footballer takes a bite out of opponent’s neck [Cannibal of Ajax]

    Rather than let his fists do the talking in an altercation with PSV Eindhoven midfielder Otman Bakkal, Ajax ace Luis Suarez decided to creative and use his teeth… to bite Bakkal’s neck. It was all over fast enough that the referee missed the action, but it was picked up...
  • Kitesurfer dies after falling seven stories from building

    A 24-year-old kitesurfer died on a wet and windy day after being blown onto hard land. The young man, who has not been named was “overwhelmed by the force of the wind while he was kitesurfing at sea” on a beach in Saint-Jean-de-Luz on France’s southwest Atlantic coast. In...
  • Sacked: Allegedly vexatious sexter cops stray football to the nuts [Brett Favre]

    Minnesota Vikings quarterback Brett Favre has been getting a lot of negative press of late. That tends to happen when you send people who probably don’t want to look at your wiener pictures of said member ; and when you allegedly hit up women with unsolicited dirty text...
  • Figure skater starts million-dollar fire with own stupidity

    Have you heard of Kurt Browning? As the picture above suggests, he is a figure skater, a former Canadian and World champion of the sport, to be exact – and if recent events are anything to go by, he may not a smart man. His recent problems started with...
  • “World’s farthest” basketball shot [Video]

    Whether or not this is actually the farthest basketball goal ever shot is difficult to determine, but it seems to be the farthest on record. Evan Sellers from The Legendary Shots throws the ball from the top of the Vulcan monument in Birmingham, Alabama. It travels some 205-228 feet...
  • North Korean World Cup coach faces music, may face firing squad

    The man who coached the lackluster North Korean soccer team may end up paying for his poor performance with his life – or at the very least, his liberty. The return of the national soccer team was not met with celebration or even commiseration. The team, minus its two...
  • Matador catches horn to the scrotum

    The fourth day of the Sanfermin bullfights proved eventful for Madrid bullfighter “El Cid” when Garboso’s horns found matador, twice. The first goring produced a 10-centimeter wound to the man’s thigh; the second also caught thigh – and scrotum. Considering that “El Cid” was able to walk from the...
  • German sports fans demand slaughter and consumption of psychic octopus

    Paul the “psychic” octopus who successfully predicted the outcomes of all of Germany’s may be bound for the hotplate if German sports fans have their way. It was the accuracy of the cephalopod’s predictions that has people calling for him to be cooked in public. When he shuffled over...