US government wants to make sure you know that mermaids do not exist (probably)

After the recent attacks by peoplethat were similar enough with horror movie zombies that they prompted the CDC to emit a statement to the effect that they did not know of any disease that could reanimate the dead, now the NOS (National Ocean Service) based in the USA made a startling discovery: Mermaids do not exist.

Actually that’s not exactly what they say, they state that they’ve not found evidence of mermaids or any aquatic humanoids, probably.

They do state that magical female figures first appear in cave paintings in the late Paleolithic (Stone Age) period some 30,000 years ago, when modern humans  gained dominion over the land and, presumably, began to sail the seas. Half-human creatures, called chimeras, also abound in mythology — in addition to mermaids, there were wise centaurs, wild satyrs, and frightful minotaurs, to name but a few.

Two thousand years from now, future archeologists will make the startling discovery that we (our present selves) do not have people that are actually half-man half-spider/bat/fish/cat etc.


Science and Tech

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