the universe and human stupidity

  • finger

    Boy amputates own finger to protest accusation of smartphone addiction

    An 11-year-old boy from Suzhou, China is said to have sliced off his own index finger to settle an argument with his father who believed that he had a smartphone addiction. When his father suggested that he put down his phone and help his brother with his homework, the...
  • _88506259_coke

    Priest Does Cocaine in Nazi Room

    Police in Northern Ireland are investigating allegations that a Catholic priest, Fr Stephen Crossan, used Cocaine in a room on the St Patrick’s Church grounds in Banbridge, in July 2015. The Sun obtained footage of a man, who appears to be Fr Crossan, snorting what appears to be a...
  • Book-Spine-Poem-003

    Russian readers argue over poetry versus prose, murder wins

    A drunken argument been two teachers (one current, one former) about the merits of poetry versus prose turned deadly in the town of Irbit, in the Sverlovsk region of Russia. The police allege that the inebriated educators fell into a bitter disagreement about whether literature or poetry should be...
  • Obnoxious one-percenter wrecks Lamborghini, restores balance to universe [video]

    If you were of the opinion that bad things only happen to good people then you should definitely check out this video. The obnoxious jerk in the yellow Lamborghini loudly revs his engine at a traffic light somewhere in suburban Chicago. The light turns green and he turns left…...
  • Mall security guard busted men killing alligator

    Two men from Lake Wales, Florida were arrested last Saturday for allegedly killing a 9-and-a-half-foot alligator at the Eagle Ridge Mall. Deputies allege that 41-year-old Rodney Michael and 28-year-old Dustin Moore used a fishing pole with chicken to lure the reptile out of a retention pond at the mall...
  • Teen girls survive freak road sunbathing accident

    Two Pennsylvanian teenagers are lucky to be alive today after they fell asleep while sunbathing on a rural Pennsylvania road and were struck by a car… driven by one of their brothers. The Beaver County Police Department explained that Samantha Schermanhorn and Kaylie George were airlifted to hospital. According...
  • Company accidentally fires entire staff via email

    The 1,300 employees of London-based Aviva Investors had a rude shock when they checked their email on Friday: every single one of them had been fired – unsympathetically, might I add. The mail, which the HR department intended to send to only one recipient, read as follows: “I am...
  • Man called 911 to make wife go to bed

    A Florida man is in the away stretch of a 60-day jail sentence for misuse of 911 – after he called the emergency line because his wife would not go to bed. Fifty-seven-year-old Doyle Hardwick of Wesley Chapel explained to the dispatcher that his wife would not stop sitting...
  • Bulletproof vest stands up to gun-owner’s idiocy [self-test video]

    Recently, in a trailer somewhere in the United States, a portly, bearded gentleman decided to put his bulletproof vest to the test. There are plenty of smarter ways he could have done this but no, he decided to wear said vest and shoot himself in the stomach with his...