91-year-old man uses his ‘Number One’ to fight kids

They'll be beating it all night.

It must be tough to be old and constantly harassed by neighbor kids.  A 91-year-old Pennsylvania man named Albert Einsig got fed up with the rabble, and in a last-ditch effort to deter those meddling kids, dumped a bucket of urine on the sidewalk facing his house.  A woman witnessed the scene and called police, who cited Einsig for ‘voiding of human excretion.’

Einsig is clearly very confused about the art of vigilante justice.  According to him, “They have been at me so bad, I don’t know which way I’m going” and “They’ll be at it tonight… They’ll be here beating it.”  Presumably, ‘it’ is his door or porch, but in any case, neighbors reportedly accuse Einsig of being the aggressor in this situation.  [Source]