New Zealand woman mistakes superglue for coldsore cream, glues lips shut

lipsA New Zealand woman found herself in a sticky situation after mistaking a tube of superglue for her coldsore cream and accidentally gluing her mouth shut. The anonymous woman was apparently reaching for her lip balm in the middle of the night and didn’t bother turning the light on, a mistake she paid for dearly when she realized she couldn’t get her lips apart.

It only got worse, as she couldn’t speak to the dispatcher after she called emergency services. After answering a series of questions with only mumbles, grunts and taps, medics made it to her house where they picked her up and transported her to hospital. Doctors were able to get her lips apart using paraffin oil.

Said the woman (via The Independent)…

“I got into bed and I could feel this tingling on my lips, so I thought I’d get the cold sore cream.

“I have all my ointments in a tray in the cupboard, so I get out of bed and I dived into the tray and I couldn’t smell it because I was blocked up.

“And then I got into bed and thought, ‘what have I put on my mouth?’.”

“I couldn’t speak on the phone so I couldn’t tell them where I lived, I couldn’t tell them my phone number,” she said.

“The communication was ‘Do you live in Dunedin?’ and I grunted ‘mmm’, and then the lady went through all the suburbs and then all the streets. She was very, very patient.

“I had to tap on the phone, one tap for no and two taps for yes, and then it took a long time to narrow down the streets and then all the numbers too.”

As bad as it was gluing her lips together, things could have been much more embarrassing for our heroine. Just imagine if instead of a simple coldsore she had been suffering from a raging case of hemorrhoids and explosive diarrhea.

NewsTop Stories

Jeff Greenwell is the writer/editor of Last Angry Fan. Jeff has been known to rock a Speedo while belting out Robert Goulet tunes from his front porch, and in his spare time he enjoys capturing and training feral goats to be his minions. Also known to dig a nice brick of cheese from time to time.
No Comment

Leave a Reply



Editor's Picks