In what purists might consider an insightful move, but most other people will frown upon, Candy Dynamics, the company that manufactures this Toxic Waste gum, has included lead in the candy. This is real lead. The actual toxic kind of lead you’re not even allowed to have in your indoor plumbing or paint anymore.
Wait, where is it made?
This is alarming for several reasons, for instance the fact that on the bars, it doesn’t actually state “Manufactured in Pakistan” but only “Imported by Candy Dynamics”. I didn’t even know Pakistan was a notable candy manufacturer, you’d think candy was made locally, in like Sarnia, Drummondville or Niagara Falls. Why do we even need to import candy from a country mostly known for “allegedly” harboring a certain Al Quaida leader we see once in a while, on a 1980s style retro video taped announcement of how all the infidels should be fed toxic waste?
Seriously, the US have had an embargo on Cuba, a mostly peaceful country, for the last what, 50 years? I bet their Cuban candy is safe to eat even for pregnant women and children.