Inmate smuggles 30 items into jail…all hidden in his rectum

*rubs eyes*

30 items in one rectum?  Call Guinness because that’s got to be a world record.  Sure, the contraband was stuffed inside a condom,  but it should be a world record nonetheless.

Neil Lansing, a homeless Florida man, went before a judge this past Friday after being arrested for an unidentified charge.  Really, that’s not the interesting part of the story.  No, the real grabber was the 30 items shoved up Lansing’s poop hole, as he stood before a judge in court.

The judge sent Lansing to jail, where a corrections officer noticed part of a condom sticking out of the inmate’s anus during a routine body cavity search.  After removing said condom, sheriff’s deputies found 17 blue pills, one cigarette, six matches, one flint, an empty syringe, lip balm, a second, unused condom, a CVS pharmacy receipt, and a coupon.

No word on what the coupon was for, but rest assured, if it was hidden up a homeless man’s butt, it had to be from one of them fancy shmancy stores.

[Herald Tribune]

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Jeff Greenwell is the writer/editor of Last Angry Fan. Jeff has been known to rock a Speedo while belting out Robert Goulet tunes from his front porch, and in his spare time he enjoys capturing and training feral goats to be his minions. Also known to dig a nice brick of cheese from time to time.
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    18 February 2011 at 2:24 pm
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