#US

  • Teacher Gets Ax For Inciting Chuck E. Cheese Smackdown

    Houston, Texas: Good intentions weren’t enough to save a private school teacher from the ax after it was found that they had encouraged students to hit a 5-year-old boy that had just punched a girl. The AP reported that the incident occurred during a school field trip to a...
  • SWAT Team Rounds Up Alaskan Pizza Bandits

    Anchorage, Alaska: A SWAT team was called in to arrest a gang of pizza thieves that had barricaded themselves in a home after their robbery went wrong. The standoff occurred on Sunday night when a pizza delivery man encountered a man armed with a gun and a stick. The...
  • Home Invaders Sought Legal Fees

    Holly Hill, Florida: Two men stand accused of breaking into an apartment and threatening to kill or harm its resident, because of an unsettled legal bill. The Daytona Beach News Journal reported Holly Hill Police Chief Mark Barker as saying: They demanded $3,200 the victim owed to attorney Ron...
  • Inmate Busted After Telling Mom Where to Find Coke

    Osceola County Jail, Florida: It is generally good to take things that people tell you in prison with a pinch of salt, unless of course it is a message on the prison phone telling you that your call is being recorded. A 300-pound alleged drug trafficker chose not to...
  • Baby Unharmed After Father Left Him in Oven

    McCracken County, Kentucky: A night of whiskey and marijuana could have turned out worse for Larry Long, but not a lot worse. After smoking marijuana at work, the 33-year-old cook returned home to consume the lion’s share of a fifth of whiskey with the baby’s mother, Brandy Hatton. After...
  • Man Fatally Overdoses at Clean Drug Test Party

    Polk County, Florida: There are ways to celebrate testing clean at your court-ordered drug test: a champagne toast, a cup of herbal tea, a few moments of reflection on the fact that you avoided court-ordered prison; and then there is the Michael Edwin Berg way. According to The Florida...
  • Lady Gaga Stripped For Own Safety

    Lady Gaga was forced to change into normal clothes on a flight from London to the United States when one of her outfits caused her to develop deep vein thrombosis (DVT). When the flight attendants saw her legs swelling, which is a symptom of DVT, they warned her that...
  • Woman Causes Car Accident While Shaving Her Private Parts

    Key West, Florida: Apparently someone didn’t get the memo–it’s never a good idea to shave your private area while cruising down the highway.  Does this mean that lawmakers are going to have to amend the law to include bikini-area shaving, along with texting and cellphone use, as no-no’s while...
  • Implanted D-cup Stops Point Blank Bullet

    Beverly Hills, California: A woman might have survived a point blank gunshot from a semi-automatic assault rifle thanks to her breast implants. The Metro reports that the gunman entered the dentist office, shot his wife and then aimed his semi-automatic assault rifle at Lydia Carranza’s chest and pulled the...