Burglars mistake man’s ashes for cocaine a little too late

A pair of miscreant Florida burglars got the shock of their life after breaking into a woman’s home and stealing what they thought was an urn full of cocaine and/or heroin.  Turns out the urn was full of the ashes of her deceased father.  The thieves also took a second container which held the ashes of her two Great Danes.

After leaving the woman’s Silver Springs house with the ashes, assorted jewelry, and a few electronic items, the pair of robbers thought they’d try a little sample of their stolen “drugs,” so they had a few snorts.  Hey, we all know drugs are bad news, but in my opinion, snorting the ashes of a dead person or animal is way worse.

The burglars realized that the “drugs” weren’t so much drugs as they were ashes, and decided against returning the remaining ashes, instead disposing of the urn and other container in a nearby lake.  The pair feared they would be caught because their fingerprints were all over the urn.

The pair were eventually arrested and jailed on numerous burglary charges.  Police divers were scouring the lake in an attempt to recover what was left of the woman’s ashes.

Snorting dead people—I think we finally found something that even Keith Richards wouldn’t do.



Jeff Greenwell is the writer/editor of Last Angry Fan. Jeff has been known to rock a Speedo while belting out Robert Goulet tunes from his front porch, and in his spare time he enjoys capturing and training feral goats to be his minions. Also known to dig a nice brick of cheese from time to time.
One Comment
  • Andrew
    12 June 2011 at 2:03 pm
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    Actually, the photo is of “The Ashes” – the prize in the biannual cricket competition between Australia and England and is the ashes of cricket pails, rather than a person – as a result, the urn containing them is tiny ( 150 mm tall) – way to small for a human remains.

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