Old and faded: Shark attacks; New and deadly: Cow attacks

cowtipping

In Soviet Nebraska, cows tip YOU.

While the media paints a terrifying picture of sharks as man-eating predators, most Americans don’t know that you’re twenty-seven times more likely to be slain by a murderous bovine.

It’s true: Between 2003 and 2008, four shark fatalities have been reported in the United States, compared to a whopping 108 deaths by cattle.  They go for the head and chest, and unlike sharks, cows have you exactly where they want you – in a caged pen.

Fortunately, Popular Mechanics recently published an article and guide on the topic, including tips for how best to survive a close encounter with a future Whopper.  The highlights read much like a zombie survival guide: Use the buddy system, run if necessary, and make certain that your tools can’t be used against you (as was the case of a Nebraska farmer accidentally injected with bovine antibiotics after being knocked over).  [Source; Image]

 

About the author: E. Thomas Drakes

E. Thomas Drakes
 

Website: http://weinterrupt.com

 

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